For those who don’t know me, I am Katy, one of Ray’s four children. This is the part of the service which they call the eulogy: the Greeks had a word for it, and it means, speaking well of the person we're here to remember and celebrate. I suppose two things strike me about the idea of delivering a eulogy on my Dad. First, it's not difficult to speak well of him, I just have to tell it like it is. Secondly, the five minutes or so that we're allowed for it, in the crematorium service, isn't very long. This is just the tip of the iceberg, and what I would love to happen would be for us all to carry on with this as we meet together later, and in the days and years ahead. Tell stories about Dad, share the memories you have, and above all raise a cup of tea or two in honour of Ray. The home where I grew up was a home full of music and singing. Dad loved playing the piano and brass instruments – for many years he played the piano and was bandmaster at Wickford Salvation Army and in recent years he was part of Rayleigh Brass playing the Bass. He loved listening to brass music, which rubbed off on me too. We spent many car journeys listening to the Black Dyke Band playing the ground force music. Dad loved singing too, which he’s also passed onto us – well Anna and I definitely. He was in the Eastwood Chorale and used to enjoy being part of a barber shop choir too. My favourite time of the year for music was Christmas, when Dad would sit and play carols at the piano, both when we were growing up and also at my house with one of his grandchildren on his knee. Dad had 5 grandsons and adored all of them. He loved nothing more than to play with them, rolling around on the floor ‘bundling’ them or bouncing them up and down on his leg. And all of them loved their Poppa more than I can put into words. To them, Poppa is now the brightest star in the sky and he sends the sun and rain to make his vegetables grow. Dad had an allotment which meant the staple diet in the Clarke household for the last few years was potatoes. He did manage to grow a few other veg too, but it was mainly potatoes. Dad grew up with vegetables growing in his garden too. My son, Thomas, and nephews, Dylan and Charlie really enjoyed helping Poppa water his potatoes and strawberries this year and I’m hoping we can continue this tradition in our garden too. Dad was born and bred in Essex and was very proud of his heritage. He spent many hours researching his family tree and really enjoyed learning about his ancestors. He grew up in Rochford with his Mum and Dad and his sister Linda and brother Andrew. I’ve heard quite a few stories about Dad as a boy. He used to tell us that when he heard a fire engine in the distance he’d jump on his bike, wait for it to pass by, then speed off after it to see if he could see the fire that it was called to. Grandma told me once that Dad was a cheeky little boy and so full of energy. There was one time that she went to the pantry to get something and there was a mouse in there, so she shut the door and wouldn’t go back in. Dad, being the big brave son, said ‘don’t worry Mum, I’ll get it for you’ and went into the pantry to try and stamp on the mouse for her, which ended up with the mouse running up his trouser leg – Grandma thinks he was about four at the time. This is the sort of thing I can imagine my older brother Matt would have done for our Mum and is exactly the same attitude that both my nephew Dylan and my son Thomas have and it’s obviously where they get it from. Dad was always so practical, and was an excellent handyman, decorator and DIY man. He built Grandma and Granddad’s under stairs cupboards for them when he was a teenager and his love for designing and creating never disappeared. I remember the wendy house he built Anna and I in the garden at Hamberts Road, we had hours of fun playing there. He would tackle any job that Mum needed doing around the house, she only had to ask, and then ask again and again and add it to a list, until he did it! He liked to pass on his knowledge to us too. Sometimes he would bore us silly with his explanations that only needed a very quick answer. His knowledge of how to jump over bollards was great! We were on holiday one year and Neil was trying to jump a bollard, Dad said ‘that’s not how you do it, let me show you’ and proceeded to jump over the bollard and break his arm as he fell! Mum wasn’t impressed as it meant she had to drive for the rest of the holiday – but the four of us all thought it was hilarious. Growing up, one of my fondest memories is when Dad used to arrive home from work and all four of us would run to the front door to greet him. I’m not sure if it was excitement at seeing him, or the thought of the sweets he used to have in his briefcase most evenings for us. Even as an adult going round to visit he used to surprise me with a curly wurly or fudge bar occasionally. When I first started working I remember Dad every morning would bring me a cup of tea and Bourbon biscuit to wake me up, and then we’d have breakfast before heading off to the station together to travel up to London. Those early morning chats meant the world to me and changed our relationship from adult and child to 2 adults. Dad was also a great pancake maker – although he did get a little bit frustrated with his frying pan every pancake day, to the point of throwing it away one year. My favourite year was 2008, when I was 8 months pregnant with Thomas and Dad just kept on making pancakes until I’d had enough – I think I got up to 8 that year! We just sat in the kitchen together chatting while he cooked them for me, which was just what he was like – he’d do anything for us. In conclusion, I’d like you all to share a thought today for Grandma as she grieves the loss of one of her sons. Any Mum here would understand how hard it must be today for her. Matt, Anna, Neil and I remember him as a Dad that we owe such a lot to, he made us all laugh growing up and was such a wonderful dad and we’ll miss him loads. And finally, you, Mum especially. You've lost a friend and husband of 36 years, and my heart goes out to you today. You and Dad have set us a fabulous example of marriage and parenthood which we hope and pray we will be able to pass on to our children and families. We all loved you Dad and we’ll miss you so much.